…And They Told Two Friends…
Dear Bitter Single Guy: A girl I know from work (but we are in seperate offices so I dont see her at work often) and I hooked up briefly. She had gotten out of a long relationship 3 months or so prior and got dumped. After dating me she then said she wasnt ready yet, but told me how much she liked me, the connection was awsome, all this stuff.. A few months later she is now seeing someone else and tells me despite how much she likes me yadda yadda something tells her she just cant be with me… what gives? – Left In The Cold
Dear LITC: The Bitter Single Guy doesn’t often hear from the other side of this equation, so he’s pleased you wrote! Typically the BSG hears from the folks who are just out of a relationship and are not sure how to re-enter the dating world (especially given how nurturning, affirming and fun the dating world can be).
Short answer LITC, you were a rebound. If your Lost Lily was dumped in her previous relationship, she probably needed (unknowingly) to reclaim control over her love life by choosing not to be with someone that she could be with if she wanted…that’s a delicate way to say ‘dump’. She was dumped, she needed to dump someone else in order to move on.
So you see LITC, she’s right…it wouldn’t work out with you because she would have never re-claimed her personal control. Don’t fret, though…you can always date someone who likes you then dump her as a way to reclaim your own dignity and self-control. And the cycle continues….
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