Best Friend’s Little Sister
Dear Bitter Single Guy: So, the title says it all mostly. I’m 17 and my best friends little sister is 15. I have known her for her whole life and I have noticed that she has grown up a lot lately. One night, I crashed at their house bc there was a storm that I couldn’t drive home in. Around 3am, I got up and went down into the kitchen to get water, and his sister was there too…and we talked for a while, and ended up making out. Do you believe in that unspoken guy thing that you can’t date the sister, or do think I should go for it? ~Crossing the Line~
Dear CTL: Well technically the Bitter Single Guy thinks that your best friend is likely to be tweaked about your late-night make out session, so worrying now about his reaction is kind of closing the barn door after the horse has left, eh CTL?
The BSG doesn’t think there’s an unspoken rule (who ever makes those up if no one ever speaks about them?) but it is a little weird to imagine your family in romantic situations, so you dating (or whatever) your friend’s sister will definitely make your friendship awkward at least for awhile. The BSG says let this one go. A relationship in your teens isn’t likely to last more than a few months, while friendships can last years. ~BSG~
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Says:
September 17th, 2009 at 4:49 pm
If you want a mom’s opinion, being the parent of a 17 yr old with a little sister who’s 14…I say no to 17 yr old BF’s making out with Lil sister. Actually don’t want the 14 yr old making out at all. But your lil sis is 15 and still don’t want her making out. Besides I agree with BSG friends last longer than GF’s at that age
Says:
September 17th, 2009 at 10:05 pm
I have to agree with the BSG. Nip it in the bud and consider it again in five years if the interest is still there, it would be a much more appropriate time. Also, sometimes its good to have a friend of the opposite sex for go to for advice. Its also a good measurement for how secure/confident your future girlfriends are. If they are totally jealous of this friendly relationship, maybe its time you re-examine the direction of your relationship.. Afterall, you did have a life BEFORE meeting this person and you will continue to come in contact with females from time to time in your adult life, so its a good measurement of how things will be handled inthe future. A stable relationship shouldn’t include large amounts of jealousy. My high school friend (of the opposite sex) is now our son’s godfather. So you never know what part she can play in your life later down the road.
Says:
September 22nd, 2009 at 1:22 pm
I have a niece and a sister who are both 15. Physically they are quite different; one could perhaps pass for a much older woman while the other is still clearly an adolescent. They also differ in clothing and style. In maturity and the ability to make decisions, they are both still 15. The more adult-looking one (read: breasts, makeup, stature) might attract a lot of older male attention, but that doesn’t mean she has the wherewithal to understand what she’s getting into or to make good choices. I also remember being 17 and dating 17 yr old boys, who aren’t exactly stellar judges of non-physical qualities. So I strongly caution the young man to recognize that his friend’s little sister may not actually be emotionally available/capable of a relationship– even though his hormones might tell him a very different story.
Says:
January 2nd, 2010 at 3:38 pm
I definitely know where you are coming from on this one. I have know my best friend since i was 6 and now I’m 18, hes 17 and his sister is 15. I am closer to her (in a strictly friends way) than i am to some members of my considerably large family. I also have little sisters (although they are much much much younger like in the not born yet to 6 range) and I know exactly how I will feel when they get to that age, so I also know how the brothers feel. I must say I agree with the BSG. If the basis of your feelings is that shes hot then the relationship will fail whatever age you are. Also i don;t know how close you are to your friend, but if I were to lose both my friendship with him and his sister, I would be losing 2 of my closest friends, for nothing. This girl is a close enough friend that the one time someone told me that she was “one hot piece of a**” that boy was sorry, and this was while there were no feelings what soever. SO in a nutshell, my advice is this: if you like her cuz she’s hot, fuggetaboutit. If you actually like her not just her body, wait, for a long time, then talk to her bro before you do anything. The bro talking is essential, cuz if y’all is messin around w/out his permission, your friendship is hosed. And lastly if he says yes, you had better be the epitome of the word gentleman. Also, almost grad has a very strong point as well. ~In the Same Boat~
Says:
May 2nd, 2010 at 6:04 pm
It’s kind of a shame to have shut down even the dimmest of hopes on this one.
Love, if you can call it that way, is so rare at that age – and it seemed like they had justified the kiss from all this wait.
I remember kissing a guy when I was 15, and I will never forget.
Adolescence is already so difficult, an innocent kiss can be a little ray of light in a what can be a dark couple of years.
Funny no one ever says, let it be love.
Says:
July 23rd, 2010 at 1:13 am
I am with Sharon let what feels right happen talk to your friend. talk to her. if your intentions are honorable, then your friend should be understanding. try not to invest too much feeling too fast relationships are complicated and should be carefully considered for all parties best interest. also, get her opinion too. life takes experience to be good and how can you have experience and be certain of love if you never try and see what doesn’t work.
Says:
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