Letting Him Down Easily
Dear Bitter Single Guy: I met this guy 3 wks ago at a stop sign when I was on vacation. We flirted and exchanged #’s waiting for the light to change. Then we texted each other for hrs and went on a date the next night. We had a good time and I came back home the next day. We text and talk all the time but I don’t want a relationship, which I told him at the beginning of our friendship. He said he just wanted to get to know me and everything was cool, but he’s very needy and freaks out if I don’t call or text. How can I politely tell him I’m just not into him? ~I Want Out~
Dear IWO: The Bitter Single Guy loved your letter! It brought him back to his own youth when he asked a pretty girl out on a date at a traffic light. The BSG recalls being appreciative of having two lights in a row during which to woo the object of his affection because, while traffic lights seem to last forever when you’re stuck in traffic, they’re remarkably short when you’re trying to be all swav and stuff. During this life-altering moment, the BSG was driving a very old (1973) Plymouth Satellite and his target was driving a similarly old ’67 Buick Wildcat convertible. As the BSG pulled up next to his target at a traffic light on US1 in South Florida (the BSG has since moved away from SoFla) he admits that he was slightly more attracted to the car than the girl (she was pretty, but that CAR!). Numbers were exchanged and the BSG was invited to a pool party with Pretty Girl’s friends. About a half hour into the experience, Pretty Girl and all her friends (all gender possibilities were represented) did a line of coke, shed their clothing and jumped in the pool. The BSG swears he is not making this up. Sadly, the BSG was always a somewhat shy type and not much for the illegal substances (or incessant sniffling) so he politely declined. As one could imagine, that was the last time he saw Pretty Girl, but the BSG has thought about her car many times since that night (sigh).
But the BSG knows that you didn’t come here to hear him reminisce, IWO! From the memories of his youth, the BSG applauds your caution-to-the-wind approach to dating and is wowed by your ability to flirt and exchange numbers at just one traffic light.
The BSG also has a big giant “You Go Girl!” for coming home the next day after your date with Traffic Light Boy. Good for you for getting that pesky physical stuff on the table (or floor, whatever) as soon as possible.
But to your actual question, this is as easy as you think it is, IWO. The way to politely tell Traffic Light Boy that you’re not interested is to politely tell him that you’re not interested. This is the relationship equivalent of ripping a Band-Aid off all at one time instead of taking it a tiny bit at a time. It may seem more painful to do it all at once, but both you and Traffic Light Boy will (eventually) be better for it.
~BSG~
Loading ...