http://bittersingleguy.com/serious-commitment/ Humorous Advice From a Guy Who's Been Dumped Once Too Often Wed, 09 May 2012 15:33:59 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.2 http://bittersingleguy.com/serious-commitment/comment-page-1/#comment-737 Almost Grad Thu, 13 Aug 2009 20:16:08 +0000 http://bittersingleguy.com/?p=526#comment-737 My boyfriend and I are in a very similar situation: Graduation approaching, real life knocking at our doors, and what next?? Many of my friends are or have been in the same place. Whatever you do, don't let your fear of the future (and don't pretend applying for law school isn't terrifying!) screw with your reasoning on what your relationship means and where it is going. Those are entirely separate questions that will inform, but shouldn't dictate, your professional path. I know couples that have followed each other to grad school, others that have done the long-distance thing, others that have adjusted plans. The ones that called it quits have done so because it was time for it to happen-- they didn't do it solely because of graduation. That happens in high school, and rightly so, but we're older and wiser now, right? Clearly not nearly old or wise enough, but 3 years in college is a lot different than 3 years in high school, as you already know. 3 years in college probably means you're living together and she (if not you) is thinking marriage. Yeah, I know it sounds crazy, and we liberated college women shouldn't think that way... but if you really believe we aren't still women with legitimate concerns about how commited our man really is... listen to Beyonce's "Single Ladies". Because that guy will be you if you can't decide (and pretty darn quick) whether you're in this for the long run, because I guarantee that's the question on your girlfriend's mind. You're trying to make big life decisions, and either she's a part of that plan, or she's not. There's not really a half-way, and she knows that even if it hasn't hit you yet. -A liberated college woman (but a woman nonetheless) My boyfriend and I are in a very similar situation: Graduation approaching, real life knocking at our doors, and what next?? Many of my friends are or have been in the same place. Whatever you do, don’t let your fear of the future (and don’t pretend applying for law school isn’t terrifying!) screw with your reasoning on what your relationship means and where it is going. Those are entirely separate questions that will inform, but shouldn’t dictate, your professional path.
I know couples that have followed each other to grad school, others that have done the long-distance thing, others that have adjusted plans. The ones that called it quits have done so because it was time for it to happen– they didn’t do it solely because of graduation. That happens in high school, and rightly so, but we’re older and wiser now, right? Clearly not nearly old or wise enough, but 3 years in college is a lot different than 3 years in high school, as you already know. 3 years in college probably means you’re living together and she (if not you) is thinking marriage. Yeah, I know it sounds crazy, and we liberated college women shouldn’t think that way… but if you really believe we aren’t still women with legitimate concerns about how commited our man really is… listen to Beyonce’s “Single Ladies”. Because that guy will be you if you can’t decide (and pretty darn quick) whether you’re in this for the long run, because I guarantee that’s the question on your girlfriend’s mind. You’re trying to make big life decisions, and either she’s a part of that plan, or she’s not. There’s not really a half-way, and she knows that even if it hasn’t hit you yet.
-A liberated college woman (but a woman nonetheless)

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