Can’t Stop Thinking About my BF’s Best Friend
Well BSG this is how it is: I’ve been dating this guy for a really long time, and he’s not exactly the best boyfriend in the world but other than some minor faults he’s a great guy.
HOWEVER…
as of late (since October sometime) I have found myself very attracted to his best friend. Maybe a little TOO attracted, I’ve begun to lose interest in being intimate with the boyfriend I have! I know for a fact the other guy has a thing for me, which doesn’t help my case any.
I can’t stop thinking about this person, but obviously it’s not like he would date me anyway even if I broke up with my current man (being his best friend and what-not). Am I losing it? ~Wandering Eye~
Dear WE: The Bitter Single Guy sees two things going on here. The first is that you’re lukewarm about your relationship. But because there’s nothing actually wrong, you’re settling for lukewarm. The BSG doesn’t think this is necessarily a bad thing, he himself has floated comfortably in lukewarm waters for extended periods of time. It can be very relaxing, if somewhat numbing.
BUT THEN…
From your lukewarm relationship you suddenly get a view of a tasty treat that you think would spice things up and now lukewarm seems kind of annoying and clingy. Yes, the BSG said clingy.
Again WE, two things here: decide whether or not to stay in your relationship (that’s one), and decide whether you want to entirely destroy things with your boyfriend (and possibly destroy his relationship with his best friend) by getting involved with the friend. Because of course, no amount of hoping will change the fact that your boyfriend will be crushed and (the BSG suspects) more than a little bitter.
The BSG’s advice is to forget about the best friend and focus on your relationship. Figure out what you can do to get the excitement you’re obviously craving in your current relationship or get out of it.
Oh and by the way…don’t read too much into the fact that the best friend has a thing for you. Because you’re his friend’s girlfriend, you’re pretty much a captive audience and it’s tacky and lazy of him to focus on you as a potential mate. ~BSG~
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