Unrequited Advice
Dear Bitter Single Guy: So there is this guy I like. A common problem, I’m certain. He knows I’m interested, but he has a girlfriend. Quite frequently I find myself pulled into a conversation about how annoying his girlfriend is and how he’s isn’t really happy with the relationship. I give him the best advice I can, trying to be unbiased, but it’s rather difficult. My question for you is how do I handle this situation? He’s a good friend and an amazing person and I don’t want to hurt him, but I hate that he asks me what he should do about his girlfriend because what I really want to tell him is “Dump her!” What should I do? ~Wanting More~
Dear WM: You’re a tool! This Devious Dude is using you to make himself feel good (because he knows you’re interested) while refusing to leave his girlfriend. The BSG recognizes this as classic passive aggressive bullshit. If Devious Dude didn’t know you were interested, the BSG might believe he was just clueless (wouldn’t be the first time a dude was clueless…the BSG knows his tribe).
Get clear, WM. The next time he asks for advice, tell him that you can’t really give him advice on his current relationship since you’re actually hoping to be his next relationship. The BSG actually recommends treating your infatuation with him like a cold. Tell him that it will pass and you’ll be able to be his friend again soon, but until then, you don’t want to spread your disease so will create some space between you and him.
~BSG~
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